Spotted in a MySpace profile listing of favorite movies: "Top Hun."
What makes it even better is that a) it's the first movie listed; b) it's someone I know; and c) the Hun jokes are endless.
In the 5th century, a confederation of Eurasian tribes established an elite school for the top one percent of their members. Its purpose was to teach the lost art of combat and to insure that the handful of men who graduated were the best fighters in the world. They succeeded. Today, the historians call it the Hunnic Empire. The fighters call it: TOP HUN.
Monday, October 01, 2007
Monday, June 11, 2007
my blue hell
Attention homeowners (and renters with nice landlords):
Do NOT. I repeat: do NOT paint your walls dark blue.
Sure, it may SEEM like a good idea. But it's not. Trust me.
When we bought our house, one of the bedrooms looked like this:
What's the big deal, you ask? That's wood paneling on the walls. Not the crappy 1970s wood paneling, but the older paneling that has deeper, irregular grooves. And, no, it was sanded or primed before the blue monstrosity was applied. Heck, they even left staples and pieces of double-sided tape on the walls. Some of the painter masking tape didn't make it down, because it blended in with the wall color -- that's the blue we're talking about here. Did I mention there's one window in the room, and it faces north?
This past weekend, we started priming it. It took three hours for mostly Pat with some Jen assistance to get one coat on. Here are the results:
You can still see the blue. Argh.
We'll be slopping one more coat of Killz on and then painting it a nice, light tan. And never painting it again.
Do NOT. I repeat: do NOT paint your walls dark blue.
Sure, it may SEEM like a good idea. But it's not. Trust me.
When we bought our house, one of the bedrooms looked like this:
What's the big deal, you ask? That's wood paneling on the walls. Not the crappy 1970s wood paneling, but the older paneling that has deeper, irregular grooves. And, no, it was sanded or primed before the blue monstrosity was applied. Heck, they even left staples and pieces of double-sided tape on the walls. Some of the painter masking tape didn't make it down, because it blended in with the wall color -- that's the blue we're talking about here. Did I mention there's one window in the room, and it faces north?
This past weekend, we started priming it. It took three hours for mostly Pat with some Jen assistance to get one coat on. Here are the results:
You can still see the blue. Argh.We'll be slopping one more coat of Killz on and then painting it a nice, light tan. And never painting it again.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
with a little bit of time and elbow grease...
Our house is looking pretty good these days.
Here's a picture of our house taken on May 8th of last year.
And here's one taken May 10th of this year.
Last summer's power-wash, last fall's bulb-planting (how can you have tulip shutters and no tulips in the garden?), and not hacking the azaleas to shit has made a huge difference.
Here's a picture of our house taken on May 8th of last year.
And here's one taken May 10th of this year.
Last summer's power-wash, last fall's bulb-planting (how can you have tulip shutters and no tulips in the garden?), and not hacking the azaleas to shit has made a huge difference.
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
"So, what are we doing today, Zuul?"
Okay, I've been neglecting the blog. I know.
I wasn't going to post about this, but I figured since I posted about my UFO sighting, I might as well put this one out there as well. Trouble is, I didn't have any co-witnesses this time.
Last month, I was sitting in the second-to-last row in the smaller of the two theaters at work. It was the middle of a board meeting, so there were about 40 or so other people there watching the board chair talk onstage. Probably about 6:15 or so in the evening. I'm paying attention to the meeting proceedings, when out of the corner of my eye I see a ball of light, probably about 16 inches in diameter come out of the corner of the false ceiling of the set (suspended from the light grid above). I shift my attention to watch as it meanders towards the back of the room. Then it disappears into the wall behind me, about eight feet to my right and six feet over my head. All in all, it took about six seconds from the time I saw it appear to the time it disappeared.
I looked around to see if anyone else noticed; no one did. At least not as far as I could tell.
There have been a number of stories about paranormal goings-on at the theater, though our official stance is that we do not have a ghost (or ghosts). The building's old; it was built in 1917, so there's plenty of history.
What I saw was not a dustball. It was not a moth. It wasn't glare. It was not a floater in my eye. It wasn't a side effect from cold medication (I wasn't on any). And I'm pretty sure it wasn't ball lightning. It was a ball of light, that went on a curvy path through the wall. I've never seen anything like it. It was completely bizarre and completely fascinating at the same time.
Yes, I'm interested in paranormal stuff, but I've never experienced anything of the paranormal persuasion before. And I certainly wasn't looking for something in the middle of my meeting.
So there's that. My first ghost story.
I wasn't going to post about this, but I figured since I posted about my UFO sighting, I might as well put this one out there as well. Trouble is, I didn't have any co-witnesses this time.
Last month, I was sitting in the second-to-last row in the smaller of the two theaters at work. It was the middle of a board meeting, so there were about 40 or so other people there watching the board chair talk onstage. Probably about 6:15 or so in the evening. I'm paying attention to the meeting proceedings, when out of the corner of my eye I see a ball of light, probably about 16 inches in diameter come out of the corner of the false ceiling of the set (suspended from the light grid above). I shift my attention to watch as it meanders towards the back of the room. Then it disappears into the wall behind me, about eight feet to my right and six feet over my head. All in all, it took about six seconds from the time I saw it appear to the time it disappeared.
I looked around to see if anyone else noticed; no one did. At least not as far as I could tell.
There have been a number of stories about paranormal goings-on at the theater, though our official stance is that we do not have a ghost (or ghosts). The building's old; it was built in 1917, so there's plenty of history.
What I saw was not a dustball. It was not a moth. It wasn't glare. It was not a floater in my eye. It wasn't a side effect from cold medication (I wasn't on any). And I'm pretty sure it wasn't ball lightning. It was a ball of light, that went on a curvy path through the wall. I've never seen anything like it. It was completely bizarre and completely fascinating at the same time.
Yes, I'm interested in paranormal stuff, but I've never experienced anything of the paranormal persuasion before. And I certainly wasn't looking for something in the middle of my meeting.
So there's that. My first ghost story.
Monday, February 19, 2007
good morning... I'm heeeere
Behold: the Wake n' Bacon. "An alarm clock that wakes you up with the smell and sizzle of cooking bacon."
I'm not sure that this would succeed in getting me out of bed, but it sounds like an excellent idea.
Mmm... pig fat.
I'm not sure that this would succeed in getting me out of bed, but it sounds like an excellent idea.
Mmm... pig fat.
Saturday, February 10, 2007
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
really? can you read?
Attention Citizens of Rhode Island:
The Providence thoroughfare known as Westminster Street is pronounced "WEST-min-ster" --three syllables, accent on the first. It is not "west-MIN-is-ter".
Stop saying that. You sound stupid.
That is all.
The Providence thoroughfare known as Westminster Street is pronounced "WEST-min-ster" --three syllables, accent on the first. It is not "west-MIN-is-ter".
Stop saying that. You sound stupid.
That is all.
Monday, January 29, 2007
behold the power of cheese
After we got back from Buffalo last month, we decided it was time to teach Daisy how to climb stairs.
We knew she could manage going up and down a few, but she had never had the occasion to climb up or down a full staircase.
I decided to move the baby gate from the bottom of our stairs and invite her to the second floor of the house. She managed to get up them with no problem, and had plenty of fun sniffing around the newly discovered territory. But when it came time to come down, we had this on our hands:
We called, cajoled, physically "encouraged" her, and even disappeared around the corner (which I thought would be the surefire winner) in our efforts to get her to come down. She wouldn't do it. She'd get on her belly at the top of the stairs and put one paw on the second stair down. Then she'd get too nervous and give up.
She was up there for about ten minutes alone at the top of the stairs, when I pulled out the treats. I put a few pieces of kibble on each of the stairs coming down. She got the first two stairs' worth, but still retreated back to the top.
Not ready to carry the 60-pound baby down the stairs, I decide to up the ante.
I went to the fridge and got the cheese. I laid the Wisconsin cheddar trail on the stairs. A small bit on every other step.
Thirty seconds later, we had a very relieved (and proud) puppy bounding through the kitchen.
We've practiced a lot since. She's all about going upstairs or down to the basement now (when we let her). It's probably not the best thing, but we couldn't keep her from learning stairs.
The fun part is, she still does the commando crawl down the stairs. Except now it's at top speed.
We knew she could manage going up and down a few, but she had never had the occasion to climb up or down a full staircase.
I decided to move the baby gate from the bottom of our stairs and invite her to the second floor of the house. She managed to get up them with no problem, and had plenty of fun sniffing around the newly discovered territory. But when it came time to come down, we had this on our hands:
We called, cajoled, physically "encouraged" her, and even disappeared around the corner (which I thought would be the surefire winner) in our efforts to get her to come down. She wouldn't do it. She'd get on her belly at the top of the stairs and put one paw on the second stair down. Then she'd get too nervous and give up.
She was up there for about ten minutes alone at the top of the stairs, when I pulled out the treats. I put a few pieces of kibble on each of the stairs coming down. She got the first two stairs' worth, but still retreated back to the top.
Not ready to carry the 60-pound baby down the stairs, I decide to up the ante.
I went to the fridge and got the cheese. I laid the Wisconsin cheddar trail on the stairs. A small bit on every other step.
Thirty seconds later, we had a very relieved (and proud) puppy bounding through the kitchen.
We've practiced a lot since. She's all about going upstairs or down to the basement now (when we let her). It's probably not the best thing, but we couldn't keep her from learning stairs.
The fun part is, she still does the commando crawl down the stairs. Except now it's at top speed.
bird paparazzi
Now that we've got a backyard, I've been enjoying the wildlife that comes with it. In the fall, we picked up a couple of bird feeders, which are now hanging off of our dogwood tree, and all sorts of crazy birds showed up. I knew some of them, but there were many that I didn't reconize from the feeders in upstate NY.
I got a bird guide for Christmas, so I spent yesterday morning looking out the dining room window through the telephoto lens of Pat's camera trying to identify the regulars and snap their pictures. Here are the highlights:
The cast of Cirque du Squirlé.
There were plenty of sparrows. A nuthatch and a couple of tufted titmice showed up.
A family of slate-colored dark-eyed juncos came and went a few times.
And the pair of bluejays -- the only ones brave enough to take on the squirrels.
A mockingbird was hanging out in the bushes.
And I finally identified the woodpecker. It's a female red-bellied woodpecker.
Daisy was sent out on squirrel-chasing expeditions throughout the day.
I got a bird guide for Christmas, so I spent yesterday morning looking out the dining room window through the telephoto lens of Pat's camera trying to identify the regulars and snap their pictures. Here are the highlights:
The cast of Cirque du Squirlé.
There were plenty of sparrows. A nuthatch and a couple of tufted titmice showed up.
A family of slate-colored dark-eyed juncos came and went a few times.
And the pair of bluejays -- the only ones brave enough to take on the squirrels.
A mockingbird was hanging out in the bushes.
And I finally identified the woodpecker. It's a female red-bellied woodpecker.
Daisy was sent out on squirrel-chasing expeditions throughout the day.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
it's about damn time
It was announced today that Twin Peaks - The Second Season will be released on dvd on April 10, 2007. That's 5 1/2 years since the first season was released on dvd and 17 years since the show was on tv.
It's already #7 on the Amazon charts.
Sign me up, Diane.
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
oh come let us adore him
Plastic Baby Jesus returns to North Buffalo manger after 8-month adventure across New York State. Baby Jesus (who also lights up) was abducted last December, days before his birthday. Baby Jesus's Owners, like Jesus, forgive trespassers.
Baby Jesus at the Rip Van Winkle Bridge, located in Catskill, NY.
Today's Buffalo News describes the note and photos that accompanied his homecoming.
"Please read this letter in its entirety before passing judgment on the actions and events that have taken place," the letter began. "We are simply a group of young adults who wished to show the baby Jesus a better life than he would have seen cooped up in an attic crawl space. He has traveled over counties and states, met people and animals alike. We have done our best to show the baby Jesus the many glorious aspects of our world."
The photo album was full of snapshots taken of their Jesus statue at various locations all over New York State. Someone had posed the statue in front of Thruway signs in Binghamton, Rochester, Albany and Poughkeepsie. The statue was photographed at the Rip Van Winkle Bridge south of Albany and at a psychiatric center in Rochester.
The Leisings' statue was posed on a bicycle, on a horse and in a car, wearing a seat belt. It was photographed in a chair next to a campfire somewhere, with a can of beer in a cup holder attached to the chair. It was photographed in someone's kitchen, next to all the makings for chocolate brownies. There was the Jesus statue again - on the campuses of Rochester Institute of Technology and Hobart and William Smith Colleges.
"We have done the best possible job we could to keep the baby Jesus safe and in loving arms," the note continued. "During the course of the last eight months, the baby Jesus has become more to us than simply a plastic religious figurine. He has come with us to parties, on camping trips, on college visits and on multiple summer adventures . . . Having to say goodbye made today a sad day for all of us.
Read all about it here.
Baby Jesus at the Rip Van Winkle Bridge, located in Catskill, NY.
Today's Buffalo News describes the note and photos that accompanied his homecoming.
"Please read this letter in its entirety before passing judgment on the actions and events that have taken place," the letter began. "We are simply a group of young adults who wished to show the baby Jesus a better life than he would have seen cooped up in an attic crawl space. He has traveled over counties and states, met people and animals alike. We have done our best to show the baby Jesus the many glorious aspects of our world."
The photo album was full of snapshots taken of their Jesus statue at various locations all over New York State. Someone had posed the statue in front of Thruway signs in Binghamton, Rochester, Albany and Poughkeepsie. The statue was photographed at the Rip Van Winkle Bridge south of Albany and at a psychiatric center in Rochester.
The Leisings' statue was posed on a bicycle, on a horse and in a car, wearing a seat belt. It was photographed in a chair next to a campfire somewhere, with a can of beer in a cup holder attached to the chair. It was photographed in someone's kitchen, next to all the makings for chocolate brownies. There was the Jesus statue again - on the campuses of Rochester Institute of Technology and Hobart and William Smith Colleges.
"We have done the best possible job we could to keep the baby Jesus safe and in loving arms," the note continued. "During the course of the last eight months, the baby Jesus has become more to us than simply a plastic religious figurine. He has come with us to parties, on camping trips, on college visits and on multiple summer adventures . . . Having to say goodbye made today a sad day for all of us.
Read all about it here.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
gingerbread cookies have a posse
Obey the cookie.
In case there was any confusion...
Biscotti has less street cred, but it's tasty.
In case there was any confusion...
Biscotti has less street cred, but it's tasty.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Monday, November 20, 2006
Thursday, November 02, 2006
I have no idea what you're talking about....
| What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Inland North You may think you speak "Standard English straight out of the dictionary" but when you step away from the Great Lakes you get asked annoying questions like "Are you from Wisconsin?" or "Are you from Chicago?" Chances are you call carbonated drinks "pop." | |
| The Midland | |
| The Northeast | |
| Philadelphia | |
| The South | |
| The West | |
| Boston | |
| North Central | |
| What American accent do you have? Take More Quizzes | |
Sunday, October 29, 2006
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
so yeah, good luck, and let me know how everything turns out.
Given everything that's been going on at work, this was too perfect to not share...
Monday, October 23, 2006
from the secret Nabisco archive
I was on the Nabisco website this evening looking for contact information so I could complain about my over-toasted, under-salted batch of Ritz Crackers, and I found the following curiosity in the Nabisco product FAQ:
"Q: Why does arcing (sparking) occur when I heat Chips Ahoy! Warm 'n Chewy cookies in the microwave?"
Good god, I can't handle the suspense. Why?!
"A: It is very important that you follow the directions on the package exactly or sparking can occur. Be sure not to microwave cookies in the wrapper, or use disposable paper, foam, or china when microwaving."
Wow. I'm not really sure that answers the question, but it's definitely going on my list of science experiments for the office microwave.
Thanks, Nabisco!
"Q: Why does arcing (sparking) occur when I heat Chips Ahoy! Warm 'n Chewy cookies in the microwave?"
Good god, I can't handle the suspense. Why?!
"A: It is very important that you follow the directions on the package exactly or sparking can occur. Be sure not to microwave cookies in the wrapper, or use disposable paper, foam, or china when microwaving."
Wow. I'm not really sure that answers the question, but it's definitely going on my list of science experiments for the office microwave.
Thanks, Nabisco!
Monday, October 02, 2006
back to normal/crazy
Daisy's been back to her usual nutty self since Thursday.
This is from last Wednesday (surgery day). We will be striving to find this part of our puppy again soon.
This is from last Wednesday (surgery day). We will be striving to find this part of our puppy again soon.
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